Google Decides Android Users Deserve Full Beers
Stand down, fierce citizens.
The updated emoji are included
in the forthcoming Android 8.1 release
. Developers running a beta version of the operating system noticed the updated beers and burgers on Tuesday, sparking a bone-chilling flashback to last month's global controversy over the
But let's get real. Nobody cares about the burger anymore. Cheese on the bottom is actually a sensible thing to do, especially when you're grilling burgers and don't want the cheese to melt too much on a hot slab of meat. The real injustice-the one not enough people are talking about-is the mutant beer that Google pushed onto unsuspecting Android users. Beer doesn't work like that. What kind of fascist serves up half-empty beers with an inexplicable dollop of foam on top? And is that even beer in that mug? Because it sure looks an awful lot like robot piss.
We may never know the truth behind this mysterious frothy vessel, but at least we now know how it ends.
[ Emojipedia ]