Sorry, But Your iPhone 5 Is About to Become Obsolete
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Image: Gizmodo

Apple's pulling the cord on its iOS guillotine a little early this year. The next operating system update will only be available for the iPhone 5S and newer devices. That means if you have an iPhone 5 or an iPhone 5C, your expensive slab of aluminum and glass is about to become obsolete.

This will be the first time that Apple has cut off updates for a device mid-cycle. It's unclear why Tim Cook and his cronies aren't waiting until iPhone day to begin the iPhone 5's slow death, but there are some hardware limitations involved. You see, iOS 10.3.2-an otherwise minor update, now in beta testing, that features some bug fixes and some new Siri commands-is only supported on devices with a 64-bit processor. The iPhone 5 and 5C have a 32-bit processor. So those phones won't be eligible for the update when Apple rolls it out to all users in a few weeks, and those phones probably won't see an iOS update ever again.

Put down your pitchforks for now, iPhone 5 loyalists. In recent years, Apple has made it very clear that it will eventually stop supporting those devices, presumably encouraging customers to buy a newer iPhone. It's happened a few times before . We also knew that iOS 11, set to be released this fall, would only support 64-bit devices and probably wouldn't support the iPhone 5 or 5C.

Again, we have no idea why Apple decided to move the 64-bit requirement up six months. Maybe it wants to sell more iPhone 7s before the rumored Tenth Anniversary Edition (a.k.a. the iPhone X) gets announced in September . Maybe there's some technical reason for the early iPhone murder-death-kill. Maybe Tim Cook is just fucking with us. Or maybe it's time you finally made the jump to a newer iPhone, before your old iPhone 5 explodes on an airplane. Probably not that, actually. iPhone 6s and 7s explode , too .